Innocent
by BigTimeRush-BTR
Summary: He just can't see how innocent he is. He blames everything on himself when he's the one being treated like some nobody. In her eyes, he's still an innocent. In her eyes, he is the best big brother in the world, even if he doesn't see it. He is her innocent.


**I'm going to write this, even if it kills me. In further advance, Jo, I'm sorry for making you seem so mean. You know I love you and Kendall together. But this had to be done in order to write the story. *gulp* Here goes nothing…**

**This story was inspired by the song "Innocent" by Taylor Swift. Man, I feel like a television commercial. Hehe… Here's some more Kendall angst and some fluffy sibling bonding. ^.^**

His heart is shattered; broken into a million little pieces. The tears come, but he refuses to let them fall. He can't, he just can't. He refuses to show weakness, even if he is feeling the weakest he has felt in a long time. His body trembles as he tries to make his way back to the apartment, tears still gathered in his emerald eyes. But they don't fall.

He makes his way to the apartment, using the stairs instead of the elevator in need of some privacy. He isn't in the mood to see anyone, especially her. She has broken his heart. He can't bear her sight, much less speak her name.

The apartment is oddly quiet as he walks inside, his footsteps being the only sound filling his ears. There's no giggling coming from Carlos. There's no high-pitched shrieks coming from James. There's no annoying math lectures coming from Logan. His mom and Katie are nowhere to be found. And right now, all he wants is for everyone to be home. He can't bear with this on his own.

He needs his friends and family.

Feeling heartbroken and vulnerable, he trudges to the bedroom he shares with Logan, locking the door behind him. He can't help but crawl into bed underneath his blanket, closing his eyes and letting a few tears roll down his cheeks. He might as well loose some of his dignity while he is alone than when his friends come home.

So many questions swim around in his head; questions he can't seem to answer. He doesn't know why it had to happen to him. Why she broke his heart like that when he thought they were meant for each other. He doesn't know the answer and it scares him.

Did he do something wrong?

Was he not good enough for her?

Did _he_ give her something he couldn't?

His whole body is shaking with sobs by now. Tears pool around his eyes and roll down his flushed face almost as soon as they gather, much like raindrops fall once they are too much for a cloud to handle. That's how he feels right now; like a sad, grey cloud that is just holding so much burden that he has to let it out somehow.

He feels the weight of someone sitting on the edge of the bed all of a sudden, yet he refuses to look up. He doesn't want anyone to see him like this, especially one of his best friends. What would they think of him if they saw him crying? They would probably think he's a looser for crying over something as stupid as this.

"Kendall, what's wrong?"

A small smile tugs at his lips when he doesn't hear the voice of one of his best friends but the voice of his 11-year-old little sister. He wants to answer her question and assure her that he is fine. But the problem is that he is too tongue-tied to speak. Instead of speaking, he rolls over on his back and stares up at her, warm tears still rolling down his cheeks.

"Kenny, what happened to you?" the little girl questions him as she leans forward and wipes away some of his tears with her thumb.

"K-Katie… I… J-J-Jo cheated on me."

Small, skinny arms wrap around his slim body and he feels himself being cradled in someone's arms. The tears continue to fall and sobs continue to slip, but he manages to wrap his arms around Katie as well. Her sweet voice fills his ears and her slim fingers run through his messy hair in an attempt to bring him comfort. And in a way he is comforted, but that doesn't change the fact that he feels completely dead inside.

"Kendall, please stop crying. You don't deserve to cry over her. She doesn't deserve you and you don't deserve her. You deserve better than her." Katie's voice is gentle and sincere, but Kendall can't help but twist her words around. Maybe he is the one that isn't good enough for Jo. Maybe she deserves better than him.

"Sh-she deserves better than me," he stutters. "And she… found it… w-with Jett."

Katie gently lays Kendall down on the soft, comfortable bed before slipping in herself. Caringly, she brushes back his cut bangs and presses her lips to his forehead. "When will you learn, Big Brother? You're the one that is too good for her."

Kendall scuffs. "Yeah right. I will never be good enough for anyone. D-dad left because of me, Katie. He felt embarrassed to have me as a son. And now, Jo left me for Jett, who, as he says, is better looking than me."

"Kendall, you know that's not true." Katie cups Kendall's face in her tiny hand, forcing him to look her in the eyes. "Dad left because he was an idiot. And Jo is an idi-"

"Katie!"

"What? It's the truth. She didn't see how amazing you are, Big Brother. Trust me Kendall; you're the best big brother in the world."

"You really think that, Baby Sister? You really think I'm the best big brother ever?" Kendall can't help the giant smile that breaks on his face when Katie nods.

"Of course I do. I would never lie to you."

"Thanks, Katie. But… Is it bad that I don't believe you?"

Katie's heart just about cracks at Kendall's words, but she understands. He wants to believe her, but he is too hurt to be able to do so. He has been treated like a doll; messed with as if he has no feelings. She may not know anything about teenage love, but she knows enough. She knows her brother is broken at the moment.

"In time you will, Kendall. In time you will see what I mean," she whispers quietly in his ear.

"H-how do you know that?"

"I just know. Everything takes time, but once your mind is clear you will see that she wasn't worth it and you can do better."

Kendall frowns. "I don't think I will ever love again."

"You will." She smiles at him. "Kendall, I don't think you see how innocent you are."

Kendall cocks his head in confusion, staring at his sister like she's some weird alien from outer space. "Me? Innocent? What are you talking about?"

"You have done nothing wrong, yet you blame everything on yourself. You feel bad even when you did nothing to deserve this. You think you're not good enough for Jo when she was the one that wasn't good enough for you. You're… still an innocent."

"I'm… confused."

"With time you won't be."

Kendall shakes his head with a small chuckle. "Girls are so confusing."

"So are you. Now… feeling any better?"

"A little bit," Kendall says truthfully. He curls up into a little ball and nuzzles his face against Katie's chest. "Thanks, Baby Sister. I love you."

"Love you too, Big Brother," the brunette girl whispers as her eyes begin to close, but Kendall suddenly sits up, his eyes scanning the smaller girl.

"Uhh… Katie, how did you open the bedroom door? I thought I locked it."

Katie snickers. "I know where you and Logan hide the key."

With a sigh, Kendall lets his head fall back on his fluffy pillow. "Yeah, girls are so confusing."

**Well that was… something HORRIBLE! I hated that, but whatever. I wanted to write it and I did. Now, on to more important matters…**

**July 16: JAMES' BIRTHDAY! Wish him a happy birthday if you have a Twitter! He is turning 22! WOO HOO! Aww, don't you guys just love it that he and Kendall are like the youngest ones from the band? I sure do… well more like Kendall. Lol.**

**Yeah, so… Man, those guys have grown. To think that when BTR started Kendall was barely 19, James was… 19 as well! Carlos was 20 and so was Logan. Man, and now on July 16, James turns 22. Carlos turns 23 on August 15. Logan turns 23 as well on September 14. And Kendall (the baby! Lol) turns 22 on November 2… Also known as El Día de los Muertos! Muahaha! I'm writing a story for that day, or I might just put up the one I wrote last year.**

**Aww! Kendall and Katelyn, the birthday twins! I can't wait until she comes back on BTR. And I'm sorry for making her character all mean in this story. I love Jo, so don't go thinking I like Kucy…. 'CAUSE I DON'T! No offence to all you guys who like Kucy, I just can't wrap my mind around them… Team Jendall! Yeah, I'm a JendallRusher. Are you?**

**Okay, enough with the long author's note. Thank you for reading! Please review. :D**

**~ BigTimeRush-BTR :)**


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